Not that bad for a first try. Like pusga said, use /opt 0. You can also use keyframes (press K somewhere, the game will move the camera to that point at the frame where you have pressed K). You can also use shaders. Press (setup > utils > shaders) or by typing /lws shadername.inc.
You can download a lot of shaders too. Begotten's shaders are nice ;)
You can avoiding that "game" in the left-bot corner by pressing escape twice.
I think the music don't fit with Toribash's videos, you haven't enough variations to make a synchronisation.
Keep it on ;)