Legit(?) app, kgo.
Age: 15
Age in dog years(1 dog year is equivalent to 7 human years): A lot
Are you a wizard: I'm jesus
Size of your wand: 2
Element of choice: Butter
If you encounterd a band of marauding orcs, what spells would you use and how would you use them: Rape spell, explains itself.
Describe your magical abilities: A shit ton of ball blazing fury.
Hair color: Brown
Pubic hair color: Brown-er
Describe your non-magical abilities: I'm a good missus
Preferred choice of wand lubricant: I just rub chili powder on it and go in
Previous magical guilds: None
Previous non-magical guilds: Fyre, Ethr
Preferred brand of magical robe(Elven, Dwarven, etc): Gangster
Harry Potter or The lord of the Rings: Neither
Which magic school(s) have you attended(Hogwarts, Camp Half-Blood, etc): Homeschool
On a day trip to Mordor you stumble upon a greasy little elf(Dobby), do you slay him because you're savage as fuck or do you give that sexy little elf a golden shower and help him find his way home: Slay the shit out of him, with my long wand
What is your experience on the battlefield: Stuff
If you were going to bribe someone to get in this clan who would it be: Ave
Your staff must be at least 7 feet to join, do you meet this requirement: ye
Are you skilled in potion making: I've got a good amount of pot(ions)
Are you a pokemon and if you are what kind of pokemon are you: Ew
Are you shiny(ignore this if you are not a pokemon): Ignored
How often do you polish your staff: 24/7
Did you study in the art of Orkology: Never
Favorite wizard: Myself
Rewrite Abraham Lincoln's famous speech as a magical incantation to make bread: Bread bread bread 4 score bam, I had a dream. Bread
Where does the magic happen: Pants
Is it the size of the moat or the motion of the potion: Both
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like: There's a slight change someone might have probably done that
Is it Dobbys fault: Always

I'm almost positive I'll be accepted becuz I'm kewl.
vote kgo