Lapsus keep to the ground, it helps you alot to gain momentum, easily manouvre, move around, as you'll be able to push yourself off the ground anytime. It's also good skills exercise to avoid dq. So "if you wanna rock, you gotta be as heavy as one". Flying makes people be like tossed stones, and that is - be generally hopeless, and easy to predict their landing place.
Good thing is actually to concentrate on chest/pecs and hips in the first "tier" of learning to relax fight. Try setting opposite forces every each turn (so for example first turn all torso twists right, the other turn chest and pecs twist left, etc.). If you want to monitor your relax level feel free to post your replays somewhere on our forums, we'll try to help, also RAsta thread might be a good options if you are also interested in wushu.
Junt, it might not be that relaxed in the past in this clan, and I know it was kinda funny when we had almost none relaxer, but those times are gone and they were all are "forced" ;p to relax fight. Maybe except SuperJoJo cause he rox in hold ;).
There's a "RA- rule" which says you should relax all every turns beginning, if you really want to play relaxed, before setting joints anew. This way you won't have now forces that you used last turn (that will possibly only restrain your movement this turn), for that second when you look at your ragdoll in relax-all state you could also take a quick look where your joints are going already (they got speed and/or rotation from previous turns, which you can use to increase speed/rotation or execute some crazy move using the speed/rotation from the previous turns), and relaxing all every turn's beginning generally help you move more fluidly. Try use as little forces as possible, and no holds, or one or two held joints max.
Observing relaxed players' moves works as well, but try never to copycat, and absolutely never - on multiplayer >.> use people's moves as a reference. I hope this "reminder" didn't get too complicated, I'll shut up nao, unless asked to answer some further questions or give further advise >.>.