When I gave birth. It stretched my asshole so wide it's used as a local car-wash today.

reposting something else because its almost as painful

back when i was in 6th grade, i was getting my stuff from my locker. For whatever reason my locker wasnt closing. then the person whos locker was next to mine said "I got this" He then kneed my locker closed. my middle finger was still inside my locker. thhe locker closed right on the finger nail. Blood started SPEWING out of my finger. Obviously my finger was broken because i couldnt feel it and it hurt like hell. It took over a week until it stoped bleeding

Got kicked in the shin