thanks for accepting my app, I am honoured to be in obey

You're welcome You and Rubberzora are now on Trial, so make sure to show your best side. This trial may take some time depending on how members think of you.

Greetings, earthlings!

I, Timee, the universally renowned master of the spatula-probing arts, have decided to blissfully mosey down over to this side of the forums in order to present you, the kind folks of [Obey], a proposition ...

I am offering to you ...

A choice ...

Not just your plain old "ketchup or mayonaisse" type of choice ...

I am offering you, to the wonderful people of [Obey] ...

The choice to either ...

Accept me, one of the nicest, most fragrant, and least sweaty members of the Toribash community as a member of your group, after which you'll be experiencing first-hand the reason why my spatula-probing expertise is unmatched in this universe and in all other parallel universes.

... or ...

*Kindly refer to Choice #1*

In each of my hands ... lies a pill ...



In my left hand, I am holding a BLUE pill ...

If you take this ... you'll feel ... great. It's blueberry-flavored. Very delicious.

...



In my right hand, I am holding a RED pill ...

If you take this ... you'll open yourselves to a world of glorious orgy-applicable

spatula-probing, complete with varying speeds and oscillations (I also have cupholders!) ...

The choice is yours ...

Though I highly suggest you folks go with the red pill ...

Also, The Architect is a douche ...

...
...
...

Yay! I've completed the longest Toribash clan application intro thus far! I've finally proven that I do not value my life outside of this game at all! GO ME!

...

Alrighty then ... Let's get down to business, shall we?

Hi! I'm Timee! I'm currently a 2nd Dan Black Belt in-game, but I'm very close to becoming a 3rd Dan (approximately a hundred more games or so). I live in the wonderful geographically-fragmented land of the Philippines, where the sun shines at night and stupid popular people get elected to Congress. That means the time here GMT-wise is +8.

I used to go by the slightly more ... verbose name of Timeenator, kinda like Terminator, but with more "Timee". As you can see, I got a name change, and my new name is really neat.

I'm a really nice dude in general. I'm 16 and I'm a sophomore in university this school year (school recently started for me; the school year starts in June and ends in March over here).

I'm majoring in Legal Management, which means that I'm on my way to becoming a lawyer. My friends and most of the people that I know irl describe me as "the cool, lead guitar-playing, varsity debating, hard drinking, womanizing, Volkswagen-beetle driving nerd/smartass/bro". I'm a high-ranking member of our university's varsity debating squad and I play basketball in my spare time. I'm also the lead guitarist in a band that me and my mates formed back in high school.

I LURV intellectual conversations, especially ones about pancakes, Star Wars, and modern political theories.

I have a girlfriend named Cheska, and she's way hotter (and, surprisingly, nerdier) than me. I also have an unexplained addiction to pancakes.

Due to my pitiful lack of SP skills, I have no replays to offer to you whatsoever. Even my in-game replays aren't that worth viewing, since I'm not that good in-game.

I've been in a few small short-lived unofficial clans and in two official clans ([Oblv] and [u]) throughout my fledgling time in this community. I cherish my time in Oblivion [Oblv] the most, because I've been with my Oblivion mates since Oblivion was a fledgling unnoficial clan, up until it became official and slowly disintegrated due to inactivity and real-life prioritization. I've been in [u] for the past 3 weeks, and I also did enjoy my time there, but unfortunately, I was compelled to leave due to the stark inactivity that's currently plaguing Ultimate.

Since I have almost no in-game use whatsoever, I guess I can serve as one of the Obey's resident lunatics (I've heard rumors that your clan is full of them). In all seriousness though, if I get accepted, I'll try my best to serve as an active forum-based member.

Basically, I just want what every Toribash player wants in a clan. A group of close friends that'll be with me throughout all of the stuff that I experience irl, be it good or bad. This is what I had (and am still having, Skype-wise) in [Oblv], and this is what I'm hoping I'll have over here at [Obey].

Welp, that's all folks.

Thank you very much for considering my monstrously long-winded app, and I hope all of you have a pleasant, pancake-filled day!

-Edit-
Hattersin and Tyzi might not remember this, but I fought both of them in an aikido server once (way back in May, I think). I asked Hattersin to autograph my colon, but he didn't know what the word "colon" meant at the time, so Tyzi had to enlighten him. My stay in that server was really fun, even though I lost every time I fought either of them. Good times.

Posting for discussion c:

Just have to say, this has got to be the best app I've ever read. Unfortunately I am taking both your pills because I am a horrible person.
I Had a smile all the way through and I'm sure you came to the right place since we're really a social clan over skill.
I look forward to arguing with you.
-----
invited for trial btw o/ welcome.

I knew that it'll be insta-join.
#obeystronk

Trick. your hands are backwards.

They aren't. The terms "left" and "right" are used according to MY perspective.

I take that back. They are, in fact, backwards. I stand corrected.

Hello, my name is Tristan, and I'm 15 years old. I am currently a Black Belt and my favorite mod is Akido or Akido Big Dojo. I play everyday for about three to five hours a day on and off same with the forums. I live on the eastern coast of North America. I take this game very seriously and don't make rude or disrespectful comments to anyone in the community. I play fair and don’t do one sided moves that make it hard for the other opponent to play correctly. I snowboard, and I race dirt bikes but I have recently stopped due to my broken wrist. I hope you guys consider me as a mature and respectful member and I can't wait to join to the team.

Best Regards,

Tristan

Please look at the first post and include all requirements given there in your app o/
I'll check back regularly so you can just edit it if you like.